"It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are."
A very wise statement! And truthful. Provo, UT does not sound like a very inviting place at the moment. I only have one more week until I go back. Although this holiday break has not been what I expected, and it has been hard, it is still much better than Provo has treated me! I am just going to have to buckle down, take A LOT OF FREAKING courage and make it through this semester! And then we will see where life decides to take me.
Over break, our family was able to FaceTime my step brother Tyler who is serving in Houston, TX.
And here we have me and my step sister Kimberly! (Kimi) She is the best. We got matching boots for Christmas :) And there is my other step brother Cole in the window being cray cray!
My song for this entry (If you haven't noticed, I love using songs to describe things). I feel like not just today but the next chapter of my life will be an even better one! I am excited to see what is in store.
Only my favorite and THE best band in the entire world)
Miley Cyrus is one of my favorite people, I don't care what other people say. This is my life theme song since the day I first heard it. It never gets old, because it is such an inspiration to keep going, no matter where I am in my life. Life is always a climb. A little grain of sand, a hill, a big bridge to build, a huge mountain, it could be anything. But we just have to take it knowing that the view is great from the top.
Christmas Eve Squared (December 23rd)
Christmas has been difficult for me for a few years. I have a hard time wanting to get into the spirit at times. But one thing that has brought me closer to Christ at this time of year no matter what is music.
Today I went to my YSA ward at home and the music was so beautiful. People sang, played the violin, and the piano. Music is a universal language that everyone can understand through its subtle power. It speaks to the soul. Sometimes when I share a love for a song with someone, or an experience from a song with them, it makes me feel closer to that person, and I will listen to the song when I miss them. That is how Christmas music is. I can feel Christ through it.
I have also been spending time with family, friends, and loved ones to feel the Christmas spirit here in Pocatello. I have a good friend named Lacey Taylor. We have spent a lot of time together lately. Sometimes it is easy to forget how good of friends you once were with someone until you are together again- then you want to see each other all the time! We love to sing. Lacey is a beautiful singer! She also plays the guitar and is very talented. She even writes some of her own music. Besides that we love to eat food, and talk about our miserable love lives. Other than the love part, our lives are pretty great!!
We visited SANTA
So much fun! (Excuse that I look homeless) We really hope Santa grants our wishes. P.S. we LOVE KIWI LOCO
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:
Don't think about what might have been. Don't think that life could be different and better if one thing was changed. The past cannot be undone- so what is the point in wishing for it? Appreciate what you have now, both the good and the bad! Life is beautiful, we just need to see it with the right perspective.
It can be difficult to find peace and to find this perspective. But this helps me:
And now my beloved brethren, I would exhort you to haveapatience, and that ye bear with all manner of bafflictions; that ye do not crevile against those who do cast you out because of yourdexceeding poverty, lest ye become sinners like unto them;
But that ye have apatience, and bear with those bafflictions, with a firm hope that ye shall one day rest from all your afflictions.
It has been said a picture can paint a thousand words.
Well, Thanksgiving and Christmas has taught me that time doesn't pause while you are away from home. Pocatello is still home sweet home and I love it, but a few things have changed! Friends, relationships, family, etc. It's kind of crazy! Anyway, here are some of my favorite home town memories:
My girls, my family, and my last summer.
MY GIRLS
WINNING a trophy at Tiger Grizz. Every year we would swim in the Snake River. That's why we are barefoot- we almost missed our award!!! This was an interesting meet. Some guy was passed out next to the course that no one noticed. We SAVED HIS LIFE because yes, we noticed!
These girls were my teammates in high school. >>> Alyssa Lewis-she runs the 800 at Weber State now. She has a big butt. That's all you need to know. Me- Yup...Byu...no I don't run on a team anymore, BUT. We'll see about that! Mariah Meyer-She rocks it as a granola in Missoula. JK but yes she goes to University of Montana and runs there. Kylie Hutchison-She stayed in good old Poky and goes to ISU! She's number one on her team. Wouldn't be surprised if she becomes an Olympic athlete.
We were inseparable! And still reunite whenever we are all in town. :) we make monster cookies, play catchphrase, and have story time. I miss them lots though! They are always there for me no matter what. No one else understands me quite like these girls! Here we are in Vegas....wait. Is that really Vatican city? NO.
<---- And here we are hiking scout mountain. I wore converse and cried. Mariah fell down the rocky hill, scraped her hip, and when she woke in the morning her scab was attached to her shorts. hahaha. We camped next to polygamists and ate poptarts.
Here are Kylie, Alyssa, and I going to one of the high school dances. The theme was "Blast from the Past" so our group went as "Grease" theme....
<---- Here are me and Kizzle a long time ago at the Jason Aldean and Luke Bryan concert!!! UGH Luke Bryan=so hot. We had so much fun!...
This is a picture of me and M Squared at my graduation this past spring! Check out my leg muscles! ---->
<----Me and Lys used to call our bus rides "living the life." We would have our own little party since everyone else's parents always came and would drive them home. Who knows where our parents always were? Good thing we had each other :)
MY FAMILY
My grandmother is the wisest woman I know. And I got my blonde hair from her :) Virgin hair holla
My cousin Savannah and my little sissies Sidney and Bailey. Every one of those girls is totes cray.
My sisters looooove skiing, but on the other hand, I kind of suck. We hiked up Pebble Creek in the summer! It's beautiful.
Me and my daddy have had some rough times but I love him no matter what. AND MY TRUE LOVE IS KIWI LOCO ---->
Have I mentioned that I love the pool?
My crazy sister Sidney and her boyfriend Layton. I hope they broke up by now, who knows though. I swear this sidewalk, front lawn, and the ditch next to our house have seen it all from young lovin to old lovin. Here is some young lovin' ----->
haha. My sister though, she just is a very enthusiastic one! Sometimes she pees her pants if she laughs too hard. Oh boy.
Only a portion of my giant family. Love them always! Applebee's hits the spot. It is also a big supporter of a close knit small town. There are pictures everywhere of our high school teams. I just love my little small town Idaho! <3
THE LAST SUMMER
Well, you could probably say that my last summer before growing up should be a story book. It was perfect. There are no words to do it justice!
Graduation was the beginning of my new life.
Me and my good friend Josh Hansen. We used to hate each other but overcame our differences!
THESE TWO ARE MY BEST FRIENDS. I never see them anymore :( Dallin Farnsworth is on his mission, and Josh Wilson goes to Utah State. They were my teammates way back to seventh grade cross country. I <3 them forever and always.
Graduation came and went.....
I started going to my singles ward with Alyssa. I met my best friend Brady Thomas there (It seems I have a lot of best friends, but that's because they are the only ones mentioned on my blog!) Long story short, we fell in love. Not like stupid love, or fake love, or player love, or any of that (Ain't nobody got time for that). It was true summer love! The kind where you think you'll be together forever, but then reality steps in and crushes your dream. We are still bff's. He lives in Pocatello so I see him sometimes. It will probably never be the same, but he is my favorite hometown memory! And I know that someday, we will both be okay with where life takes us, whether it's apart or together.
<----Before he left on his mission, Brendon and Brady were inseparable! BFFS Baby Fish for life is what they said. WHO KNOWS...anyway, Ashlie Bohn is one of Brendon's best friends and we hung out with them all the time before he left! This is one of the times they visited me at work! I guess it was the night of hats? Like I said, who knows with them... lol. And I AM wearing pants.
BABY OLLIE!!!! he is the cutest weiner dog. --->
I love him! My relief society president from the YSA ward is one of my favorite girls. Her name is Hailey Reed and this is her dog that she brought to one of our softball games! That dog loved me because I fed him a hot dog.
<----Some girls in my ward. We went to the temple together as a ward! That was a beautiful night. Temples are the most beautiful thing.
DROP DEAD DIVA=best show ever. This is ---->
Grayson Kent. His real name is Jackson Hurst. Sunday was the day that the new episodes would come on, so Brady would always would have to watch it with me! It's about a model who dies and comes back in a fat lawyer's body. It's kind of a girl show...but it rocks!
<----On this day we went to the pool! WE LOVED THE POOL. Seriously. People probably thought we were so annoying, especially when we would swim around the lazy river, but who cares what other people think as long as you are happy. :) (I look trashed but you would look that way too if you stayed up until at least 2 AM every night)
I love to see the temple, and the classic, "I'm going there someday." We went to SLC it was so much fun! This may seem like a lot of pictures, but this doesn't even come close to all of them!
BRADY posing it up
Watching the MOTAB practice...
Basically it was like 95 degrees and I was sweating up a storm
We did not mean to match! haha so it was pretty funny
"I threw a wish in the well" from the song of the summer, "call me maybe." that's not really where we got the idea haha. But we really did throw pennies into the fountain and make wishes together!
<<<At the pool...again. haha like I said, we loved the pool!
hahaha funnest night. Our whole area of YSA wards put together a BBQ/slipnslide party. This girl was like omg...he is sooo cute. And I said, "oh that's my boyfriend!" and she said yeah right. hahaha well okay. I went down the slip n slide in my CLOTHES, and got full of mud and grass. It was fun none the less.
<----Finding Nemo 3D!!! I am a child at heart. Only he would tolerate something like that haha.
Who knows why we look so tired? It's not cuz we stayed up until 6 AM that night talking or anything! who am I kidding we totally did! This ----->
was the day I moved to Provo. :( Bye bye summer I'll never forget you!
All in all, I wouldn't trade any of it! It stinks the way things have turned out but I wouldn't be the same without it.
You always had an eye for things that glittered But I was far from being made of gold I don't know how but I scraped up the money I just never could quite tell you no Just like when you were leaving Amarillo Takin' that new job in Tennessee And I quit mine so we could be together I can't forget the way you looked at me Just to see you smile I'd do anything that you wanted me to When all is said and done I'd never count the cost It's worth all that's lost Just to see you smile When you said time was all you really needed I walked away and let you have your space 'Cause leavin' didn't hurt me near as badly As the tears I saw rollin' down your face And yesterday I knew just what you wanted When you came walkin' up to me with him So I told you that I was happy for you And given the chance I'd lie again Just to see you smile I'd do anything that you wanted me to When all is said and done I'd never count the cost It's worth all that's lost Just to see you smile
Okay we all know the world isn't actually going to end tomorrow, but it just so happens that I have recently learned a lot about myself and about living for the present.
College seems to be a full time party before you actually get there. Hot guys, skipping class, eating ice cream, and having sleepovers with roomies is what I pictured. I pictured college being my time to finally shine and have a fresh start. Once I got there I realized how great hodunk Pocatello actually is, how much I do love having my mom around, saying goodbye is harder than it ever has been, and I actually can't always do everything on my own! College isn't full of partying, if you actually want to get good grades. (Especially at BYU-there is no partying at all :) ) College is hard work.
So, here are some important things I have learned from moving away and becoming a grown up:
1. Sometimes you may think you know exactly what you want, so you make a big decision based on that. You find that it's not what you want once you see the results. This is part of life. It hurts, it's hard, it sucks, but YOU WILL LIVE. You will get through it.
2. While you're searching for who you are, you might find who you are not. That may not give you the answers to everything but it's a start.
4. Although I may not be particularly enjoying where I am, there are always good people somewhere- you just have to be looking! Here are some of my friends:
Ashbee Petersen- My roomie :) We got put together for a reason! She is the best. She is from a real live hicktown, like off of "Sweet Home Alabama." Her graduating class had 16 people in it. We knew we were meant to be roommates the first day we met, because she told me her boyfriend's name is Brady Thomson. That was just too cray cray!
Haley Pendergast- she is from the 808! Incase you didn't know, that is Hawaii. But she is even whiter than me! I thought all Hawaiians were tan for some reason. Anyway, she is the sweetest, smartest, classiest, most humble girl I have ever met. She always is there for me to vent to! Not about missing home though- because she misses home also. Who wouldn't miss Hawaii? We like to eat together a lot. It helps us feel relief from homework. That is about as exciting as our lives get!
Sally Park- my crazy Korean friend. She is an Asian diva. Her singing voice sounds like angels from up above.That about sums her up. Her favorite lines are, "That is so fricken funny!!!" and "wowwww you look sexy." At church, she never pays attention. She just reads Korean romance on her iphone. Whenever I am sad about my old boyfriend she says "Laken, I bet he is missing you right now just like you miss him!" I say, "yeah right, he doesn't even care probably." and Sally will say,"Fine then. He hates you and wants you to die." hahaha she is hilarious. I think I would go crazy if I didn't have a little Sally in my life! P.S. Sally=best name ever, right?
Amber Huntsman, Kensington Osmond, and Brittani Elkington. We're like "mean girls" except it would be called "nice girls" for us. Amber always knows what to say, Kensi is your typical girl from Chicaaaago and Brittani always makes you laugh. I could hang with them all day!
Soooo...notice I have no guy friends in Provo. That's because they're all annoying and rude. Stuck in the high school lifestyle is what they are... but that's okay because I have my girls!
5. "Learn from the past, prepare for the future, but live in the present." -Thomas S. Monson. There is nothing for you if you are stuck in the past. Perhaps you are wishing for easier or better times. Or perhaps you can't forgive yourself for some mistakes you made that are haunting you. Just take the lessons from your trials and move on. The future is important, but don't waste precious time worrying about what could happen tomorrow, when you have today! Love who you love, live your life, and enjoy it. My favorite book Tuck Everlasting is about a family who can live forever. Through their experiences being stopped in time, they have a different perspective than most. "Don't be afraid of death, be afraid of the unlived life."
"One today is worth two tomorrows." -Benjamin Franklin
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